I hope that this diagram will help you to see the relationship between the various modes and their substitutions. Just remember, what applies, theoretically to scales or modes, applies to chords and triads too. Some things to consider briefly: With complex harmonic environments characterized by frequent or rapid changes you may only have time to hit the chord tones. As the harmonic environment becomes increasingly sparse (i.e., characterized by long, static vamps, you'll find increased space for exploring the kind of possibilities illustrated by this diagram.
Stop worrying about hitting the 'wrong' notes. There are no 'wrong' notes per se. Start thinking in terms of freedom, color, duration, inflection, tension, release, statement, representation, play, humor, dissonance, etc...........not patterns, boxes, and obligations.